Prequel Trilogy

A creepy fan describes how he teaches his godson to hate the Prequels

From Nathaniel Muir at AiPT!:


” […] After the prequels were released and succeeded in disappointing me, it never occurred to me that anyone had actually enjoyed them. I was caught completely off guard when my cousin told me that not only did he enjoy the prequels, he thought they were better than the originals! It was then that I decided that I would not let another be seduced by the prequels.

By the time my godson Teddy was old enough to search through tablets and find videos that interested him, The Force Awakens had been released and had restored my faith in the franchise. I did not want the same thing that happened to my cousin to happen to Teddy. I knew I had to instruct him in the proper way to watch Star Wars. The first thing I had to do was train him to channel his nostalgia. I subtly directed him to what is arguably the most memorable scene of the entire franchise. I would have Teddy watch the short clip multiple times a day, showed him how to find the video, and constantly had him show it to others. It was not long before the first thing he would tell me when seeing me was he wanted to watch, “I am your father.”

The next step was to teach Teddy to control his emotions. In order to teach him how to master his emotions, it was important for me to attach significance to his nostalgia. There was always a positive reason attached to watching the video. Whenever he picked up his toys, acted politely, or just made me laugh, I would show him the clip. I never forbade him from watching it or used it as a form of punishment since I did not want any bad memories associated with the scene. Soon, he started liking Darth Vader and even dressed as him for Halloween.

Things have gone well up until now, but the toughest trial is to come. Teddy will soon discover the prequels, and with its garish colors, impressive special effects, and kid friendly characters, I slightly worry about what the future holds. I have already made preparations to fight the inevitable temptation. I rarely discuss the prequels but if they do come up in front of Teddy, I talk about them with obvious scorn. Though he has no idea what I am talking about, I have told him many times that he should never watch The Phantom Menace. I have also reminded him many times about the greatness of the original trilogy. One day he will find the prequels on his own and watch them, but by that point he will have been taught to channel his emotions and disregard any optimistic feelings he may have about Episodes I-III. […]

I have begun Teddy on the road to properly appreciating the best movie franchise ever and will do everything I can to make sure he is not corrupted by the prequels.  I hope that he takes these lessons to heart and passes on what he learns.”


  • Caleb

    This is nuts. Why not, you know, let the kid choose for himself what movies he’s going to like? Is that, like, not allowed?

  • KirkMan1701

    This guy is an EPIC AUTOCRAT and I fear for his godson Teddy and if I were in Teddy’s life, I would call Child Protective Services on the bastard and have Teddy taken away from that evil germ, Someone please call CPS on this nincompoop and save teddy from being brainwashed since what he proposes is child abuse. This sick man not only needs to have his godson taken away from him, he also needs to be locked up in a mental hospital.

    This paranoid lunatic wants to teach his own personal hangups to his godson which is inexcusable. This insecure germ bases his whole life and parenting on 100% PURE UNREALITY in that he is obsessed with which Star Wars movies other people enjoy and bases his parenting on that!.

    NEWSFLASH Nathaniel the Germ, I never really enjoyed your preferred Star wars growing up and it messed up my life really bad whereas the prequels give me an alternative to remedy that problem. Come to think of it, I bet you will most likely ensure that the original trilogy will ruin Teddy’s life since you plan to deny him the right to watch the prequels over it! Don’t come crying to me if your godson starts hating on the original trilogy over you trying to force him to not enjoy the SW prequels, since you would only have yourself to blame for it.

    Double Dumbass On You, Nathaniel Muir!

  • andywylde77

    ” After the prequels were released and succeeded in disappointing me, it never occurred to me that anyone had actually enjoyed them.” Well in this idiots first sentence I already seen what is wrong with him. He would have known the opposite if he didn’t live with his shoved firmly up his own ass! But I digress here. I am a Godfather myself. And my Godson is also my cousin as well. And this guy is beyond ignorant. I am sure people like Simon Pegg, Will Wheaton and now Max Landis would all get along great together. Birds of a feather flock together…

    But I have seen the all too often. If someone is going to censor any kind of entertainment to a child, whether related or not, then I wonder what else they try to censor them from? I will never understand why some people are so hung up on destroying something that others may or may actually be enjoying. If this clown doesn’t like the PT then that is his business. Because I have no doubt that if the situation was reversed, he would be crying and saying how he was being treated unfairly. If the kid enjoys the PT then let him be. So basically this idiot wants to indoctrinate his Godson by telling him what is good and bad? Personal opinion be damned! I feel bad for all the others that have to deal with these kind of “fans.” Because anyone on this site alone knows that this isn’t an isolated incident. Far from it.

  • Marshall

    “The Force Awakens had been released and had restored my faith in the franchise.”
    Anyone who says that is A.) Stupid and B.) Never loved the Original Trilogy in the 1st place because TFA took our beloved heroes hard-earned happy ending and ripped it to shreds. Han and Luke are cowards, Leia is demoted to general, and Lando disappears into thin air. The Rebel Alliance should’ve just obeyed the Empire like good little citizens, Luke should’ve gotten a job at the Toschi Station and Han should’ve turned down that offer from Obi-Wan…
    Oh and Nate, maybe you should never bring your boy to conventions of any kind, because – gasp! – there will be prequel cosplayers there!

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